Do you ever feel like you’re in Season 5 of your life, and the writers are just doing outrageous stuff to keep it interesting? I think my other three stove burners are becoming jealous of front-right. Being an adult is mostly just wondering if the stuff in the dishwasher is dirty or clean while eating soup out of a sand castle bucket. If you want to have fun with your kids, tell them the teacher called, then ask if there is something they need to tell you. Nothing in the world is more expensive than a girl who’s free for the weekend. What kind of jerk makes an anti-anxiety pill difficult to break in half?